The most important choice each of us has in life is to choose our priorities. What you do, and the outcome you achieve, is a direct result of the choices you make and the priorities you give to every task and project you encounter.
If saying “yes” leaves you feeling frustrated and stressed, annoyed with yourself, and feeling, deep down, then perhaps you’re putting your priorities in the wrong place.
Try choosing “no” more often: When “no” is the right answer for you, say it politely, assertively and with conviction. See how much better that can make you feel.
The moment you recognize your needs and priorities, and find a better way to meet them, you’ll find better peace of mind, and life will change for the better. This was recently realised by a close relative of mine that over such a long time, realised that the priorites that they had set in early life had to change or suffer the consequences.
We discussed this and she revelaed to me her revelation. Almost immediately after she told me, I raised my hand to give her a high 5 as it made so much sense. She is now on the path to rectifying some behaviours which my be challanging at first, but will ultimately lead to her greatest good.
Now think again about the times you’ve said “yes” before in your life, when really you wanted to say “no”. Practice saying “no” politely and firmly. Remember, when “no” is the right answer, you’re not making excuses; A brief and honest explanation of your reasons should be enough if needed.
“No” is hard for many of people to say. We all like to feel appreciated and useful to others. But it’s often far better to say “no” and concentrate on a few great wins, than to say “yes” after “yes” after “yes” and deliver poor results on the things that matter most. Or overcommit yourself to things that could potentially do you harm in the long run.
Either you’ll do it voluntarily and deliberately, or you’ll do it when you collapse with a nervous breakdown. You owe it to yourself to take control of your own life and make the hard choices now, when they may be uncomfortable but at least they are do-able.
Something has to give. Don’t let it be you.